There is a long time resident of this street a couple of doors down from me and it’s my understanding is that she has lost (or is losing) her eyesight. Scotland’s home care programs are amazing, and she has carers come in four times a day to help her with her daily activities and meals. I don’t know if her husband lives with her, or is even still alive, but I do see a couple of the neighbours pop in to visit her from time to time. I spend a lot of time at the window facing her front drive & walkway, so I see all the comings and goings. To be clear, it’s the kitchen window where I cook, wash, clean up, etc – I’m not peering out a window all day from behind net curtains, like my Mum’s neighbours in Bellshill did in the 40’s & 50’s (nothing went on up the North Road that the Misses Hamilton didn’t know about, believe me). No, it’s just the way the house is designed and the street is laid out – I see it all.
Every time I see the carers coming/going I get thinking about how we care for the elderly – either here or back home. I think it’s great that this lady is able to stay in her own home (and keep in mind, I am doing all this speculating without knowing a thing about this individual or her circumstances – I just can’t stop thinking about the bigger picture). But is it the best thing? I assume that for most of the day, she is alone in that house, as opposed to being in a community care facility where she would be interacting with other people. Granted, maybe she doesn’t want to interact with others, or leave the surroundings she is most familiar with. But is she lonelier than she need be?
Staying in your own home seems to be so important to many elderly people – continued independence? costs? familiarity with surroundings? limited services available? – but I often wonder if that wish is based purely on emotion. I remember my aunt and uncle talking about how, once she had been diagnosed with Alzheimer’s, she would be staying in their home; she would not be going into care, as there were so many in-home services available here in Scotland. Which was terrific to hear about Scotland (my cousin tells me it’s much better up here than down in England – Alba gu bràth!). And yet I remember when my Mum moved out of their apartment into Glendale Crossing, her days became much more active and interesting – she had people to watch, and things going on around her – my sisters and I believe she was truly happier then. I’m not criticizing Ian & Margaret, or my Mum & Dad; nor am I saying one decision is better than another; we do what’s right at the time, based on our own circumstances and the information at hand.
And I do get that many senior care facilities are substandard. CFUW Milton has been very active over the last few years in lobbying the Ford government to bring elder care up to acceptable levels. And I know nothing of what’s available in Lanarkshire for the elderly or infirm. I just can’t help it – every time I see the carers go in & out, I get thinking about it all over again.
I have made one decision: now that I’m settled here, I’m going to ask a couple of the neighbours if they think this lady might enjoy a periodic visit from a gentle, friendly dog. Scout can earn her keep on this street.